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   Author  Topic: I can not stand it any more!!!  (Read 4227 times)
Elaine
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I can not stand it any more!!!
« on: Jul 28th, 2002, 2:40pm »
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What in the heck is going on??? I see clusters being blames for everything. Bad marriages...getting fired...losing homes....There was one post years back about a lady that hit her kid because of clusters. Come on people clusters are bad I admit and they hurt like hell. But for Gods sake don't blame everything on clusters.  
Hell I have had clusters for ever it seems like but they did not cause my bad marriage...I contributed to it as well as my ex. I lost a few jobs but it was my own damn fault not clusters.
I friggen get depressed but because I let myself. I know what to do to get out of it but I don't sometime I just a waller in it.  
I ran away from my responisablitys and things got bad and bills did not get paid. Not clusters fault.
EVERYTHING IS NOT CLUSTERS FAULT!!!!!
To be a cluster head does not mean we lose our lifes it means we hurt like hell. Not one of us will get any better us less you get off your butt and do something about it find the right drug and right doctor. They are not going to knock on your door..you have to work and find the answer. I am so tired of I tried everything and nothing works BS!!!! Its a damn cope out.  
No wonder everyone is sad and depressed around here ! Every post you open these days is so depressing its pathetic. Just plain pathetic.
Sorry but I can't take all this pity me BS! Maybe I am in the wrong place.
Can't you people find anything to be happy about?
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jonny
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Re: I can not stand it any more!!!
« Reply #1 on: Jul 28th, 2002, 2:51pm »
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Im sorry I come here everyday and whine.
 
Im sorry I have clusters that make every thing in life go against me.
 
Im sorry blue and pink pigs fly out my ass every second tuesday of every month.
 
Im sorry it took me 23 years to find my family.
 
Im sorry that I just might be the queerest of the queer.
 
Odd?
 
Pretty much so!
 
...................jonny
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The  mad viking
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Re: I can not stand it any more!!!
« Reply #2 on: Jul 28th, 2002, 4:01pm »
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Finalyy somebody took the chanse and tell us what has happend here in the last 6-8 month.
I tried to write a message about this some months ago.
And guess what.Just 1 had the guts to give me a reply.And that was Sailpappy.
Thank you for that pappy.
I have noticed for the last year or so that most of you my friends has started to "paint your lives black"Do not say all of you but most of you has done that.
Maybe you did not understand me.Hopefully you will understand Elaine way of putting this up on the agenda.
Thanx for that Elaine
 
I love you all friends but sit down and try and lissen at Elaine words
 
 
Svenn
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Re: I can not stand it any more!!!
« Reply #3 on: Jul 28th, 2002, 6:54pm »
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Elaine,
 
 
YOUR LIL FLUTE BLOWING FAIRY MAKES ME HAPPY.
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Mark Hoebener
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Re: I can not stand it any more!!!
« Reply #4 on: Jul 28th, 2002, 6:58pm »
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on Jul 28th, 2002, 6:54pm, markdavid wrote:
YOUR LIL FLUTE BLOWING FAIRY MAKES ME HAPPY.

 
Paging Dr. Freud. Paging Dr. Freud...
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jonny
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Re: I can not stand it any more!!!
« Reply #5 on: Jul 28th, 2002, 7:32pm »
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Ted,
 
Your fucking killing me.......LMMFAO
 
...................jonny
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Elizabeth
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I AM HAPPY....
« Reply #6 on: Jul 28th, 2002, 7:56pm »
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I AM HAPPY BECAUSE.....
 
The sky is at its perfect point - my perfect night sky - beige to the west, just at the horizon, changing to blue as the eye rises.... a bright midnight blue up above... the darkest blue to the east.....
 
I heard a child's laugh today....
 
I didn't have to work at either of my jobs today....
 
My air-conditioning works....
 
I received a compliment....
 
The lawn isn't growing so it doesn't need to be mowed....
 
There's no snow to shovel today.....
 
The kitties dumped over my favorite shampoo.... now the shower smells like violets....
 
I take responsibility for myself and my actions.....
 
PROZAC WORKS....
 
Last time someone told me to 'get over it' and 'pull myself up by my bootstraps' I told him to go fuck himself.....
 
The laundry is sorted.....
 
I just read the new jokes in the Funnies section here at ch.com
 
I'm alive....
 
I can move.....
 
I can breathe....
 
And there are painfree moments between headaches.
 
 
 
JMHO.....  Liz
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Drk^Angel
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Re: I can not stand it any more!!!
« Reply #7 on: Jul 28th, 2002, 8:41pm »
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Elaine... I'm sorry if you took my post as an attempt for pity.  I didn't mean to ask for pity, and I don't want pity, but that's besides the point.  The point is... Your post seems a bit insensitive to me.  Insensitive to the ppl that are getting hit bad, who are have had a hard time, and who seems to be at the end of their rope.  Feeling as though nothing is left, they are grabbing for the last shred of hope they have... The support of this board.  You may be able to live a normal life while in cycle, but not everyone can.  CH is not only pain for some ppl.  For some it is a life crushing, debilitating disease.  You're right... We are all responsible for out own lives, but that gets harder and harder as the odds stack up.  And when it gets to the boiling point, and they can't take it anymore, they just ask for a little support from the board... From the ppl that is supposed to understand what they are going through.  The truth is... None of us can understand exactly what everyone else is going through, but what makes this board great is that it doesn't matter.  We still will give our all to support those who need it, and not complain... Not ask for anything in return... Not belittle them.  I'm sorry if this ruffles anyone feathers.  I don't mean to offend anyone, and I definately don't mean to offend Elaine.  But instead of accusing ppl of begging for pity, maybe we should do what we are here for... To support those who needs our support.
 
PFDAN...................... Drk^Angel
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sailpappy
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Re: I can not stand it any more!!!
« Reply #8 on: Jul 28th, 2002, 8:53pm »
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;D ;D Elaine,Elaine.,Elaine=
     don't you know that there is a quote about this very thing, People living in glass houses shouldn't throw stones.
 I Love you my Friend and you have had almost as big a plate full of hardships here as I or any other person that posts, My memory isn't the Greatest and I'm not going to pull out the archives to prove a point, but I know you have been as guilty of this very thing too!
     How many times have you told us good bye saying you would never be back to post again, I can think of at least 3 or 4 in the past year or so.
 Clusters do cause many deviations from the norm in peoples lives, not only those that suffer from them but their friends and family and employers and fellow employees.
 So while I agree in that your own personal attitude is germaine to how people feel about you and how they see what you post here, we are all affected a great deal by this malady, life is hard and it can become harder if you let the demon take control of your emotions.
     I think we all have posted self pity posts at some point and we all are guilty, some times we just need to  
hear from people we respect that they understand and care!
 I myself try not to post selfpity posts, as I do not pity myself, I need to find the core of joy and I often do it at the expense of others that seem to set themselves up for it!   Life is hard but if you only look around we are surrounded by people that do care about us, we have each other as well as our own personal friends and family, we are the lucky ones and I strive to seek out those less forutnate to make myself constantly aware of this fact, no matter how hard life is for me, there is always that miner that is trapped in a hole in the ground,freezing for 36 hours before anyone can get to him, there is always that bus full of church kids that didn't make it to summer camp because of an accident that devistated the rest of their young  lives. There is always that homeless guy you see riding his bike along the side of the road that everyone assumes because he is down on his luck he surely has to be an alcoholic.
 So I say this to Youa and our whole family, Seek the truth for it is the truth that will set you free!
     I love everyone here, yes even you Markdavid and that is my slant on this question of posts that portray our lives as blaming everything and everyone else for our problems, actually I don't see it myself but if you say it's here Ms. Holloman Teacher extraordinare it surly must be!  Pappy
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Elaine
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Re: I can not stand it any more!!!
« Reply #9 on: Jul 28th, 2002, 9:21pm »
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You are so right sailpappy but not ever did I try to do away with myself because of a CLUSTER! Yes I have posted my share of post that were a pity me thing. But you know what when people gave me advice I didn't say oh I tried that it didn't work, or keep coming up with reasons not to try. I always got up. Some of these people have painted a black picture and they can't see any color no matter what ya do for them.
 I am chronic and I have spent all of my adulthood with them. I never found the meds I needed till I came to this site. This is where I found it. What my post is saying is just don't blame everything on cluters. Its not cluters alone that cause all this that has been posted.  
.  
If you really read my post you will understand what I am saying.
You can beat me up get mad, but if you guys don't find something bright in life clusters are going to win with your help.
I just won't let it happen to me. I love my family and friends and I want to be here for them and I can and will be. No demon of any kind is going to make me give up. I am going down fighting if I lose.
If you guys are mad and upset I am sorry I am not insentive I would just like to see more people get up and not let cluters win.  
I will help anyone that will help themselfs , there one lady I care about very much here a copule of them as a matter of fact. They have problems but they don't blme it on clusters, they blame it on what it is Life.
Like I said maybe I am in the wrong place.  
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Re: I can not stand it any more!!!
« Reply #10 on: Jul 28th, 2002, 9:37pm »
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;D ;D Ms. Elaine, I didn't intend to sound as if I were beating you up at all, I love you, I was just pointing out that you had done the same thing on occassion, Your the reason that I stayed on the board and one of the reasons I continue to stay here, I have a lot of problems in my life as I know your aware of, I have never blamed anything but Fate for this, and I have tried every medication ever mentioned on this site, with the exception of the mushrooms!
     Yes there are people here that blame Clusters for everything wrong in there life, but in doing so they are screaming out for help not sinicisym(?) Your a very smart ,caring person, that has gone way out of her way to help those that ask for it ,but personally I find you a little short tempered or short on compassion for certian people depending how they word their post, I am a nut case, I hear and see things others don't even in my reading of posts here, I have preminitions and once in a while I share them when they are about someone from the board, I had one about you back several months ago way before I met you at Engle wood, I felt that if it were to come true it is fate so I have never mentioned it, as it was a bad preminition, if your interested in this type of rambling let me know and I will write to you and tell you about it, unless your hair has been red by mistake within the past 2 months or so I wouldn't torry about it, if that happened and on that day your Step Daughter told you some earthshaking news then write me!
     I would never insult you on purpose, I just think the ability to deal with not just CH but other problems as well is a learned trait and until you have to do it you may not know that you have the ability to be so flexible.
   
        Pappy
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Re: I can not stand it any more!!!
« Reply #11 on: Jul 28th, 2002, 10:20pm »
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on Jul 28th, 2002, 8:41pm, Drk^Angel wrote:
 The truth is... None of us can understand exactly what everyone else is going through,

 
Something we should all keep in mind.
« Last Edit: Jul 28th, 2002, 10:25pm by rick » IP Logged
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Re: I can not stand it any more!!!
« Reply #12 on: Jul 28th, 2002, 10:24pm »
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on Jul 28th, 2002, 9:21pm, Elaine wrote:
when people gave me advice I didn't say oh I tried that it didn't work, or keep coming up with reasons not to try. I always got up. ...    

 
Food for thought, brother Dark.
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Re: I can not stand it any more!!!
« Reply #13 on: Jul 28th, 2002, 10:54pm »
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Most importantly, I knew you'd get a kick out of that one Jonny. LOL
 OK. Here I sit defending what Elaine said and that she said it. Who cares who brought the subject up? The point is the same. I read everyday about how this is a support group. A place to go to complain about life. NO!!!!! This isn't what this was not so long ago. this was a place to go to find the latest info about CH. This wasn't a place to write "I have clusters so my wife is leaving me because I'm impotent." (the wife thing wasn't about you, Drk) This was NEVER that place. Hell. None of us were impotent till we found the bandwagon to hang on to. Sure Elaine got in the self-pitying point before. Seems to me she's fucking straight up about what needs to be said. And for those of you that say "we've all done it," hit a history. Hit on me. When have you ever s3een me doing it? I'm not saying it's bad when someone hits there point and starts complaining. But DO NOT say "we've all been doing it." I live in my own world and I don't bother you with it. Don't tell me I ever let you into what I go through. I may become an not a very nice person at times and y'all sit there and ridicule me. But name one time I've laid my shit on you. Elaine, you are right. Yeah, you've done it. Who cares? You were straight up with this place. Now let's get to this shit of what this board USED to be. Let's find a cure and stop crying because my CHs causes hangnails! Let's get some balls again!
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Re: I can not stand it any more!!!
« Reply #14 on: Jul 29th, 2002, 12:05am »
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Oh Shit.  BALLS!  CALLING ALL BALLS!!! Cheesy
 
Wish I had some BALLS! Cheesy
 
 CryKIMMIE got NO BALLS Cry
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Re: I can not stand it any more!!!
« Reply #15 on: Jul 29th, 2002, 12:20am »
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Well, maybe someday you will, Kimmie
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Re: I can not stand it any more!!!
« Reply #16 on: Jul 29th, 2002, 12:29am »
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Ted!  What sort a balls should I ask for?  Huh,?  Bad balls?  Good Balls?  happy balls?  sad balls?  Whuh?   Cheesy
 
Elaine, ya can smak me if it feels fun.Betcha it does. WinkNOW SNAP OUT OF IT ;D
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Re: I can not stand it any more!!!
« Reply #17 on: Jul 29th, 2002, 12:30am »
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Kim,
 
Yeah, what do they say the ladies have when they are tough and courageous  ???  
 
This is a real question, I don't have a smart ass answer for this one.
 
But maybe someone else has one?Roll Eyes
 
On the serious side, and I'm not being critical of anyone here, what Elaine and Ted are trying to say is that we're not going to get anywhere feeling sorry for ourselves.  And they're right.  I completely understand that we all get our ass kicked by life from time to time, but the important thing is to get up and keep swinging every time you get knocked down.  
 
Pappy, from all the stories I hear about the things you've had to deal with, I think of you as one of the stronger people I've met here.  
 
Dark, keep your focus man, dig deep, look the beast in the eye and FLIP HIM THE BIRD!!!  You can't give up without having tried everything.
 
Much love to everyone,
 
-Rick
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Re: I can not stand it any more!!!
« Reply #18 on: Jul 29th, 2002, 12:37am »
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And while we're at it (ooops. I should have probably shut up long ago) what's up with those of you who sit there and bitch that your doctors don't care enough to look into what a Ch is and just treat you like another migraine patient? Whine and bitch about some doctor who has no personal involvement to learn anymore because your personal check pays him just the same, educated or not. But, you who has a personal stake in an understanding of CH sit back and say "Oh. Someone else will do the work on an OUCH committee. I don't need to. I'm too busy complaining about my doctor not understanding to get involved anyway. Plus, it will cut out moments of my chat time. What do you expect of those not affected when not even you can volunteer some time?  
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Re: I can not stand it any more!!!
« Reply #19 on: Jul 29th, 2002, 12:39am »
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Hey Kim. Start out with a set. then come back and ask how to fine tune them. But start out easy and just have a set to begin with.
« Last Edit: Jul 29th, 2002, 12:40am by Ted » IP Logged
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Re: I can not stand it any more!!!
« Reply #20 on: Jul 29th, 2002, 12:41am »
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Did not and do not often get to sit down and really talk with the women folk around here.  During the day my time is filled up with loving and caring for my family.
 
I jokingly asked for balls b4.  that was just me being an idiot.  I already admitted to my blatant idiocy in prior posts and a strong desire to dispell pain by continued divertive idiocy.
 
Having watched a grandmother die in my arms.  Having to currenlty watch my mother suffer of cancer.  Having to raise three young lil girls, well i guess balls is one thing I jokingly call upon both for a laugh and for that weird connection that women can once in a while share.
 
What smart ass are you calling too?
 
Callin all angels.  always.  Kim
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Re: I can not stand it any more!!!
« Reply #21 on: Jul 29th, 2002, 12:44am »
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Oh, and Ted, my set SERVES WELL.
Start to Finish.
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markdavid
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Re: I can not stand it any more!!!
« Reply #22 on: Jul 29th, 2002, 12:46am »
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Well said Dark and Sailpappy!! Ted ya have a good point, but we all handle things differently. Oh and your real quick on the uptake... wow 4 min to think about my comment and reply... Tongue
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Re: I can not stand it any more!!!
« Reply #23 on: Jul 29th, 2002, 12:49am »
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Then if you have a set, and you're still asking what kind you need, ask for a good set of balls.
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Re: I can not stand it any more!!!
« Reply #24 on: Jul 29th, 2002, 12:50am »
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Hi Mark. Smiley
« Last Edit: Jul 29th, 2002, 12:52am by Ted » IP Logged
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