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Topic: Not wanting to be seen (Read 943 times) |
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BarbaraD
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Re: Not wanting to be seen
« Reply #25 on: Sep 4th, 2005, 6:40am » |
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I hid out for years and then "came out of the closet" and said the hell with it - I have an ailment that I can't help - if people can't deal with it - that's their problem NOT mine - I can't help it!
I'm an accountant and deal with the public. Most of my clients have, at one time or another, had to excuse me, when they see my eye swelling and tears start rolling, but they don't ask too many questions (my assistant watches me and gets them out of harm's way - I do tend to get violent if anyone touches me) - my assistant explains Clusters to them. I get my meds down and go back to what I was doing when I'm able.
The "funniest" one (if a CH can be funny) was the Kip 10 that hit in the middle of an audit in the IRS office. Boy, did they get a course in CH in a hurry. I sorta acted up.... I was banging my head on the auditor's desk, had meds scattered all over his neat little papers and had the whole office running for coffee and water and wanting to call the EMTs. My language was not very "professional" and it was mass chaos until the meds took effect. BTW - I actually won the audit before I left, and none of my clients have been audited since. Maybe .... there's an up side to these things after all......ummmmm......
My point is -- at some time or other, we have to learn that we can't help what is happening to us and have to accept it. Others around us aggraviate us with "Oh I had one of those one time - it's awful!" and all that baloney, but we learn to ignore that part eventually (or at least quit getting angry about it). Over the years (since I quit hiding) I've actually found numerous people who suffer from CH who NEEDED someone to talk to about CH and were going through the same thing. It's been a great eye-opening experience being there for them. My assistant's neice was diagnosed with CH. When she called me (at Pete's insistance), she seemed so relieved to talk to someone who actually understood what was wrong with her and understood what she was going thru.
You might want to check with DJ (he's spent years in the military dealing with CH) and see how he handles things when he's been deployed. You certainly don't want to be put in harms way or put anyone in your outfit in harms way because of an attack of CH. Get a plan in case one hits.
Good luck to you and PF days and nights..
Hugs BD
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What don't kill ya, Makes ya stonger!
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KMT
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Re: Not wanting to be seen
« Reply #26 on: Sep 4th, 2005, 9:43am » |
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I like the company of my husband gently rubbing my neck during an attack. But around Coworkers, family and friends I just want to run. I spend more time appologizing. I was sorry for exposing them, sorry for ruining a good time, sorry for feeling sad when the warnings came on........
Explaining, I still do I try to get the information out there so more is known about us CHers. I took the letter to coworkers and friends to work and e-mailed it to my family just so they understood as best they can. Subjects of migrains, HA, sinus HA, and stress come up but I do my fair share of letting it go because at times it feels like a lost cause.
Welcome to the sight PFDAN.....................Kim
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aka...................................................... KimY
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drivin_blind
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Re: Not wanting to be seen
« Reply #27 on: Sep 6th, 2005, 10:52am » |
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I too wish to be left alone when I get hit. I was in the U.S.A.F. in the early '70's. Worked in the missile system. We would be out working for 36 hours straight at times. The guys on my team were good. I never knew what was wrong with me then, but the lack of sleep would really trigger C.H.s. Just told them I had a really bad headache. Was unable to pace as I was stuck in a work cage about 3 feet wide. I didn't dare say much about the intensity to the Drs. as I had a T.S. crypto clearance. I'm still sure to this day I would have been jerked off the job. Have been chronic for the last 20 years. I hope by now they have subsided so you can get some sleep. Best of luck. The people on this site have made me realize that I'm not alone and most of all....Crazy!
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The true measure of a hero is when a man lays down his life with the knowledge that those he saves....will never know.
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seasonalboomer
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If I think hard enough maybe it'll go away.....
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Re: Not wanting to be seen
« Reply #28 on: Sep 6th, 2005, 11:02am » |
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on Sep 6th, 2005, 10:52am, drivin_blind wrote:| I too wish to be left alone when I get hit. I was in the U.S.A.F. in the early '70's. Worked in the missile system. We would be out working for 36 hours straight at times. The guys on my team were good. I never knew what was wrong with me then, but the lack of sleep would really trigger C.H.s. Just told them I had a really bad headache. Was unable to pace as I was stuck in a work cage about 3 feet wide. I didn't dare say much about the intensity to the Drs. as I had a T.S. crypto clearance. I'm still sure to this day I would have been jerked off the job. Have been chronic for the last 20 years. I hope by now they have subsided so you can get some sleep. Best of luck. The people on this site have made me realize that I'm not alone and most of all....Crazy! |
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Hey Drivin':
Always good to know that someone with a beast ripping through his eyeball was only feet away from "the button".  Glad you kept it together.....  for all of our sake.  Also good to know this wasn't a post to the "KIP 10 - Suicidal Thoughts" thread .....
Scott
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| « Last Edit: Sep 6th, 2005, 11:03am by seasonalboomer » |
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seasonal boomer
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drivin_blind
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Re: Not wanting to be seen
« Reply #29 on: Sep 6th, 2005, 11:53am » |
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Yeah, It would have been quick and painless, but would have left one hell of a smokin hole. Actually never considered the suicide thing until years later. Stress of job, family and other responsibilities were just about all I could take. Thank God for a wonderful wife that was (and still is) understanding. I think that is what gets a lot of us through this. She's put up with these for 30 years last month. I think she suffers watching me almost as much as I do. Good spouses are hard to find!!
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The true measure of a hero is when a man lays down his life with the knowledge that those he saves....will never know.
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Salvelinus
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With Him, all things are possible. ><>
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Re: Not wanting to be seen
« Reply #30 on: Sep 6th, 2005, 7:19pm » |
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on Sep 6th, 2005, 11:53am, drivin_blind wrote:| I think she suffers watching me almost as much as I do. Good spouses are hard to find!! |
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Amen to that! 
Namaste,
--Scott
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| « Last Edit: Sep 6th, 2005, 7:20pm by Salvelinus » |
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Namaste,
--Scott ><>
"When no one else knows how I feel,
You run to me, with outstretched hands,
and you hold me in your arms.
Again."
--Building 429
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