Posted by the original gary g (209.187.112.172) on April 08, 2000 at 12:27:41:
Graham -
You hit the nail square on the head.
I didn't go away mad a couple months back, I just went away. I didn't figure it was up to me to tell the "board" how to behave, so I didn't.
BUT - in the last couple of months I have had emails or phone calls from at least a dozen people all saying basically what Graham is saying, and asking me to say my piece. So I will.
If anybody is even vaguely interested, Graham's observations are exactly why I don't bother much anymore. I hope that over a couple years I was able to pay back for the help I got when I first found CHMB by helping others with meaningful info and suggestions;
but like Graham, I have seen a very sad deterioration in the quality and focus of the discussion.
It just isn't worth the effort to pick through all the litter to get to the point.
I still "check in" once a week or so, but must advise the trend appears to be getting worse, not better.
"So Gary" -predictably say the social activist types - "why don't you try to make a positive contribution to reverse the trend?"
EASY - I DID try to do that, for most of a year;
But after a while it became IMPOSSIBLE to even FIND the solid relevant discussion threads, that actually related constructively to CH - in between all the irrelevant junior high playground bullshit. (And that refers to an OVERALL general tone - not just the "schoolhouse" series, though that IS included)
My goal is exactly the same as Graham's - find a way to build/rebuild a solid balanced life, in spite of CH. CHMB was once a valuable asset in doing that.
The material that has flooded the board in the last several months is NOT leading to a balanced life. This is because as a group "we" have refused to stick to our primary purpose and refused to remember that people come here with help for Cluster Headache - not an episode of Sesame Street meets Miss LonelyHearts
Now it seems it is more a hangout for folks who want to crawl into their computers and hide from life and the world, playing silly games to convince each other they're working on a problem, but actually doing all possible to AVOID it.
Try this experiment folks -
Put yourself in the shoes of someone who has just "landed" here and needs help - real help - with their CH
OR
Pretend you're a DR that some sufferer has convinced to check this out
OR pretend you're an employer or insurer of someone with trouble because of CHMB, who has come here to try to learn a little
OK - got one of those hats on ?
Now - start at the top and start reading posts.
How far did you get before you said to yourself - "what a bunch of juvenile foolishness" and signed off.
This board has been HIJACKED by a small group of people who are dependent on it for strange, self-centered SOCIAL needs which really are NOT Cluster Headache specific, and are defending their right to dominate (hell, "overwhelm and repel all boarders" would be a better image) as a forum for social escapism.
It's really too bad -
If some of you "newbies" wonder what I'm talking about -
Go to the archives section,
Drop back to 1998, and early 1999, and read a lengthy sequence of posts
Then come back here and do the same
Q.E.D.
(snotty abbreviation for "'nuff said" )
For you "oldtimers" who HAVE been in contact with me, but who I see playing the same game on CHMB - put your public money where your private mouth is -
- what's more important ? being popular with the other kiddies or HELPING somebody ?
don't be such wooses - SPEAK UP!
We can ALL find "clubhouses" anywhere we want
We CAN'T find real dependable help with the specifics of CH anywhere else
and it looks like we can't find it here anymore, unfortunately
Are you REALLY satisfied with that trend?
To the FEW who have diverted and commandeered this board as your playground:
You may have good intentions,
However, remember: the good is the enemy of the best
And CH is such a huge and horrible problem, only the best will suffice
Stop being so damned self-centered
Your social needs are NOT more important than all of our needs to find real relief or improvement from CH no matter what you tell each other
and NO, the endless stream of goofy, irrelevant and just plain stupid drivel is NOT a huge help to anybody-
so AT LEAST cut out the pitiful self-delusion up"
SUGGESTION:
For one week-
If what you've got to say isn't DIRECTLY specific to the disease of CH,
directly, first and foremost,
then shut the F.... up for once in your life;
Believe me, the world won't collapse without the babble,
and you just MIGHT see an example of something really worthwhile develop
it was here once
maybe it can come back