I don't know anymore...and i'm trying so hard

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Posted by August ( on March 14, 2001 at 18:56:44:

I've gone for 3 day's/night without any sleep. The peak of 10's i'm back to passing out again. Not passing out sleeping. I mean blacking out from pain at the peak of it. I"m getting hit with 10's every 2-3 hours. I'm a mess, I"m shaking, my thinking is fractured...i don't think it's possible, i don't mean mentally, emotionally i'm not strong enough...i mean physically possible to take anymore. Maybe i'm not strong enough too...i don't know. All I know is that i think it can't get any worst..but it does, it always does.

A new feature has been added to my already messed up face. A vein is bulging off to the side of my left eye(side each attack is on) it runs down and curls just a little under my eye. I don't mean a visible vein, but one that has protruded out and hurts to touch it. It's been there for 3 days now.

No one can help, i already know that. Maybe just pray for me i make it through the next 9-11 days of this cycle of level 10's i get stuck in every freakin month. I guess i should ask nicer than that,...please somethng help me, i'm not making it.

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