Idiots on parade :^)

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Posted by Charlie SW ( on March 21, 2001 at 01:01:40:

HOW DO THESE PEOPLE SURVIVE!!! Recently, when I went to
>McDonald's I saw
> on the menu that you could have an order of 6, 9 or 12 Chicken
> I asked for a half dozen nuggets. "We don't have half dozen
>nuggets", said
> the teenager at the counter.
> "You don't?" I replied. "We only have six, nine, or twelve," was
> reply. "So I can't order a half-dozen nuggets, but I can order
> "That's right." So I shook my head and ordered six McNuggets.
> * The paragraph above doesn't amaze me because of what happened a
>couple of
> months ago. I was checking out at the local Foodland with just a
>few items
> and the lady behind me put her things on the belt close to mine. I
> up one of those "Dividers" that they keep by the cash register and
> it between our things so they wouldn't get mixed.
> After the girl had scanned all of my items, she picked up the
> looking it all over for the bar code so she could scan it. Not
>finding the
> bar code she said to me "Do you know how much this is?" and I said
>to her
> "I've changed my mind, I don't think I'll buy that today". She said
> and I paid her for the things and left. She had no clue to what had
> happened.....
> A lady at work was seen putting a credit card into her floppy drive
> pulling it our very quickly. When inquired as to what she was
>doing, she
> said she was shopping on the Internet and they kept asking for a
> card number, so she was using the ATM "thingy".
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> I recently saw a distraught young lady weeping beside her car. Do
>you need
> some help?" I asked. She replied, "I knew I should have replaced
> battery to this remote door unlocker. Now I can't get into my car.
>Do you
> think they (pointing to a distant convenient store) would have a
>battery to
> fit this?" "Hmmm, I dunno. Do you have an alarm too?" I asked.
>"No, just
> this remote thingy," she answered, handing it and the car keys to
>me. As I
> took the key and manually unlocked the door, I replied, "Why don't
> drive over there and check about the batteries. It's a long walk.
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> Several years ago, we had an Intern who was none too swift. One day
> was typing and turned to a secretary and said, "I'm almost out of
> paper. What do I do?"
> "Just use copier machine paper," the secretary told her.
> With that, the intern took her last remaining blank piece of paper,
>put it
> on the photocopier and proceeded to make five "blank" copies.
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> I was in a car dealership a while ago, when a large motor home was
> into the garage. The front of the vehicle was in dire need of
>repair and
> the whole thing generally looked like an extra in "Twister". I
>asked the
> manager what had happened. He told me that the driver had set the
> control" and then went in the back to make a sandwich.
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> IDIOTS AT WORK... Sign in a gas station: Coke --
> 49 cents. Two for a dollar.
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> IDIOTS & COMPUTERS My neighbor works in the operations department in
> central office of a large bank. Employees in the field call him
>when they
> have problems with their computers. One night he got a call from a
> in one of the branch banks who had this question: "I've got smoke
> from the back of my terminal. Do you guys have a fire downtown?"
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> IDIOTS ARE EASY TO PLEASE I was sitting in my science class, when
> teacher commented that the next day would be the shortest day of the
> My lab partner became visibly excited, cheering and clapping. I
> to her that the amount of daylight changes, not the actual amount of
> Needless to say, she was very disappointed.
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> Police in Radnor, Pennsylvania, interrogated a suspect by placing a
> colander on his head and connecting it with wires to a photocopy
> The message "He's lying" was placed in the copier, and police
>pressed the
> copy button each time they thought the suspect wasn't telling the
> Believing the "lie detector" was working, the suspect confessed.

Smiles,- - -Charlie S :^)

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